Preparation for my surgery

 

   Preparing for my top surgery.

Top surgery definition: this is trans male chest reconstruction surgery which is where the breast tissue is removed and the chest is reconstructed to form a male chest figure. This includes resizing and moving the nipple. There are many different types of surgery as it can be done though periola keyhole surgery. Nipples can be left or removed and repositioned. They can also be removed completely where some men go on the have tattoos or choose not to have at all.

I am have double mastectomy with nipple graphed, this is because I want a male chest figure which matches my gender identity as male. Ben had this surgery done in may 2017. So over 2 years ago, before becoming pregnant. This means that breast (chest feeding) a baby is normally not possible because all milk ducts are removed. You may still lactate a bit but not enough to provided enough nutrition to the baby. But this is not a problem for us as we formula feed ariyah and would do the same if I was to later go on to carry a baby myself.

Any ways it has finally come to me having surgery, it is something that has be along waited for because waiting lists for hormones or surgery are now so long, you could be waiting years. I got referred for surgery in June 2018, being fast track due to Ben being pregnant at the time with our son Nico. I then had an consultant appointment a year later in June 2019, however I could not make it due to trains being cancelled and Ben was then on pregnancy bed rest with ariyah. I got a appointment pretty quickly in augest 2019.

The consultant appointment was just to see what type of surgery I wanted but also what was possible, determined by the size and structure of my chest. I was hoping for peri, keywhole surgery as then I would not be left with scars. Unfortunately one side is bigger and my skin elasticity would mean I would have a wonky chest with nipples in the wrong place. In light of this I choose to have the double mastectomy so I could get the best results. The surgeon went through what the surgery entails as well as any risk that comes with it. What recovery would be like, or how long il have to be off work

To my surprise he offed me a date for the December 2019, this was only 4 months away, sooner then I expected. On average there is a wait up to 6-9 months after the consultant until surgery. Obviously I took the date. It did mean that we had to then plan ahead due to Ariyah being due in November. She would then only be 5 weeks old. Thankfully she was born early and healthy so she is a bit older at 2 months old now when I am actually having surgery. 

I cannot believe how quickly the time has come around and that we are here in Hull today for my surgery. I am nervous and it has been very stressful preparing for this day. 

Firstly as it is in Hull and we live in London it is a long way to travel. We had to ensure we had trains booked in advanced as they are also expensive. Then we had to make sure we had a place to stay for the week. I have to stay up there for at least two days as it will be too soon for me to travel straight away even in a car.  We have a house rented which we have a en suit bedroom and kitchen. This was essential to have a kitchen at least a kettle and microwave to sterilize and prepare Ariyah-mai milk. Furthermore being cheaper for us to make our own food instead of worrying about getting dinner somewhere.

So with all this booked in advance with my dad arrange to come pick us up on the Saturday. It was then the stress of packing and making sure we had everything. I will do a further post about travelling with a baby and the essential things or trick we found helped.

We had some worries and stress over the last few weeks with ariyah-mai being unwell, she had a cold, along with all her reflux. It was big a concern that she may not be well enough to come with me meaning her and Ben would have to stay in London. The thought of them not being there really worried me, which is why we thought for her even more to get the right care and so she be much more comfortable to travel. Which she did, then she started teething which does not help when she is so young. It meant we had to hold teething toys for because she was to young to hold them helpself. We brought her gel, so. We could massager her guns. Now she two months we could start giving her small amount of calpol only ones a day. 

Then Ben has been ill the last few days with a tummy bugs, on top of this he had a allergic reaction to medication he took for his tummy which led to him havinng to go to a&e on Monday. The day before we were due to travel. At first we did not know. What the rash was as it just suddenly come up in blisters which spread and covered his whole boby. (other then feet and face) we worried it was something worse, that may be contagious. Lucky after some antihistamine and steriods it disappeared and he was better. Again it was touch and go weather Ben would of been able to come with me and that him and the baby would of had to stay in London with his aunt or my dad and step mum offered to have thebaby to help. Thankfully it did not come to that and in the morning he felt fine to come with me. He did have tablets to take all week that made him. A little tired so he was worried about night feeds especially the Wednesday night that I would have to stay in hospital for. However he was able to come and Ariyah-mai to support me.

But for now we are up in Hull at the hospital waiting for my surgery. Again I will do an update on how it all went.

Photos of the place we are staying, travelling and me ready for surgery to follow

(Written in December 2019)