First adventures

 

Life with a new born. 

Ariyah-Mai is now two and a half weeks old. I can not believe how quick it has gone and just how big she is getting. The community midwive team have discharged us because she is doing so well. Her jaundice is basically gone, her unbiblical cord fell off in the first week so her belly button is all healed. Ben is doing well and healing great, so everything is amazing. Ariyah-Mai is now almost 7lb, she is feeding, growing and sleeping perfectly. She Bearly moans or crys, she stirs a bit when we change her because it is cold or if her milk has to cool down when she is ready. Other then that she is a calm happy baby.

The only issue we have had is with her being slightly constipated, however because she is going it just hard small balls the doctors are not concerned. They have told us to give her a few slips of water after each feed which seems to be helping a little. She did have a bit of blood in her bowl movement so we did have to get an out of hours doctors because she was straining in pain and crying too. But as I said the water seems to help and it is slowly sorting her tummy out. Along with massaging and bending her legs up to her stomach. Another tip is to bicycle the baby legs tucking one knee up to belly and the other stretched out, then alternate the legs.

We have also been out a few time with her already, mainly shopping to get her smaller clothes because even newborn clothes do not fit her. We had to search for tiny baby up to 6lb clothes (matalan had a large range). She is so good and content even on the bus when we have to get her out to feed her, or walking around shops. Everyone is so surprised by how small she is, thus she has got a lot of attention. People ask how old she IS, when we state her age people are shocked and say how brave we are to be out with a 2 weeks old. I do not think it is brave it is just want you have to do. When we do not have a car and when we need things. Life has to continue and it is better then being stuck in doors.

We have got a routine at night now, where I stay up til mid night to do night feed, then Ben will do from midnight til morning. Ben will nap during the day however I can not nap in day light but getting from 12 - 6 am is enough for me and tbh I slept less  before the baby Wass born. This routine works for us and especially when I go back to work.

Emotionally we are doing very well too, after everything we have been through, the constant fear and snuggle everyday all seems like a long time ago. It is all worth it and don't even seem reliant now. After lossing Nico and then Ariyah-Mai being born early we are emotional and have had a few happy crys but that is all to be expected. Despite this and the tirness of having a newborn we are coping very well, the midwives, doctors, health visitor and family & friends all comment on how well we just took to parenthood. This is because me and Ben have been ready to be parents for a long time, with our jobs and past experience we know what to expect and for now, everything is just perfect.

I am sure we will have many chanellges thrown our way, from Society and from our daughter for sure. But I know that with all we have faced that me and Ben can get though anything together.

This weekend she had her first little hoilday to whitsable to go stay with Ron and Scott and our niece, who was very excited to met her little cousin. Ron and Scott are a trans, and non binary couple who have got three children. Ron carried his two sons before transitioning. Then Scott carried there daughter after socially transitioning however before hormons or surgery. I have known them for years from uni, so was there throughout them having their youngest now they have been there for us with Nico and Ariyah-Mai. It is very special that Ariyah is going to grow up with a big cousin who has two daddies like her. Meaning they can confined in each other and know what each other may come across from other people, mainly when starting school. Even though they are not blood they are family.

I will update next week on how our weekend and first Halloween away was, with tips on how to pack and travel with a baby. I hope everyone has a great Halloween 🦇

 Ariyah-mai with her brother Nico 

 (Written on 31 October 2019)