New year 2021

Goodbye 2020- hello 2021 

So as we see in 2021, me and Ben look back on how far we have come in the last two years mainly, then the 4 years we have been together. Summery of this time last year and the year before.

2018-2019 - we had not long lost Nico, we were in bits and broken hearted. We didn't want to go into a new year knowing he was not coming with us. We decided last minute to get away, so we went to Spain for new years. It gave us a chance to just spend time just us, talking and grieve for Nico. To get away from other stresses of life. It really helped me and Ben just re evaluate and start the new year with hope as well as loss for our son. However to look forward and take his memory and spirt with us. As we stood on the beach in Spain, writing his name in the sand, we sent a bottle message out to sea for him and watched the fireworks knowing he was there with us. Counting down with a Spanish tradition of luck by eating grape and drinking cava, to see in 2019. 

After that we had a hard long year again but it also brought us our amazing rainbow miracle. The birth of our second child. Our daughter. She brought so much hope, joy and happiness along with sadness of what could have been with our son. Meanwhile she had his heart and soul we could tell. She was blessed by him and arrived safely after a difficult pregnancy of worry and fear. Early, but health and strong.

2019-2020. We saw in the year with family around, celebrated yet another hard year but this time with our rainbow. As we let off fireworks, cheered and was thankful. We remembered those we lost and loved ones we missed.

2020 brought on it's own challenges with having my surgery, having a young baby. Who had allergies, reflux and was very poorly ending up in hospital a lot. Then with a damp flat meaning we had to move earlier and find a new job and house, with ariyah still being very young. We moved out of London to Kent which desire being best thing we did, there was it's our challenges.

As then came the covid pandemic, a deadly virus which spread the whole world. We were all put in lockdown having to stay in doors. Shops, schools, everything closed. We were not allowed to see family and it was months of restrictions. Then as the summer came the number of cases dropped meaning we had a bit of freedom. We were able to get out see a few people, but social distanced, wearing masks everywhere. But we made ariyah first year memorable. As winter came yet again covid got worse so more restriction and thing were closed ones again.

We celebrated Ariyah's first birthday with a small number of people but luckily we got to do this, as at the time it was a rule of 6 in doors. Before lockdown happened ones more. 

Christmas and new year this year was just me, Ben and Ariyah alone. As restriction of lockdown meant we could not see anyone yet again. We had a close bubble a friend and her son, luckily who we could socialise and met with a few times. 

2020-2021. Sat on the sofa watching the empty streets of London on the TV as they did a live countdown and fireworks still. Looking back over the year being thankful for what we have, people we did get to see and the things we still got to do. Having the house, Ariyah and me and Ben being so strong. Looking to the future with hope ones more for good things to come.

Happy New year everyone, I hope you all stay safe, be thankful and together we will fight covid, we will create a new life, of normality and a future for the next generation to be proud of.